why? why? why?

Assalamualaikum w.b.t to all readers :)

I think i've been away from blogging like ages ago and I felt bad for myself...blogging is definitely not my thing eventhough I enjoyed writing..i just need to take a huge amount of effort and determination to touch these keyboard which I can't seem to find. Actually I did wrote something as a draft but never been posted. I just don't know why...(ok..i need to stop blabbering)

why did I started blogging in the first place?

Because somebody asked me to? For fun? Because I will be happy when somebody read my posts? To show off to all my friends that I have talents in writing blogs? Because I was being praised for my mind-blowing posts? Because I have followers and I don't want to disappoint them?To spend my free time because I don't have anything to do? As my hobby? Because I like typing? Because I can't sleep? Because I took a lot of pictures and I wanted to show it? I wanted to share all my thoughts which can't be expressed by talking? Because I don't have friends to talk to and feel lonely? Because I don't want to help my mother at the kitchen and used my blogs as an excuse? Because I want to be seen as a busy person?

(you can change blogging to anything you want. e.g: cooking. meet friends, camping, shopping and start thinking why you are actually doing it)

Narrated 'Umar bin Al-Khattab: I heard Allah's Apostle saying, "The reward of deeds depends upon the intentions and every person will get the reward according to what he has intended. So whoever emigrated for worldly benefits or for a woman to marry, his emigration was for what he emigrated for."

Ya Allah...please forgive me..

I spent my life not for you to See

I just do things to make myself happy

I forgot to make You my sole priority

everything that I've done until now are just a waste

due to the worldly happiness that I chased

the splendor of this world had me dazed

I forgot why did you create me in the first place

"We did not create the jinn and men except to worship us" -Surah adh-Dhariyyat: 56)

And [mention, O Muhammad], when your Lord said to the angels, "Indeed, I will make upon the earth a successive authority." They said, "Will You place upon it one who causes corruption therein and sheds blood, while we declare Your praise and sanctify You?" Allah said, "Indeed, I know that which you do not know." -Al-Baqarah 2:30

Sometimes people just do things due to a simple reason and live their life shortsightedly. For example, they went to Terawikh because it is a custom for Malays to do during Ramadhan. They went for practical medical training in hospitals simply because they wanted signature. They went to classes because it is in the timetable. They study and read books because they wanted to pass exam. They cook and give to neighbors or friends because they wanted to be praised for their talents in cooking. They eat because they are hungry. They wake up at 6 am because its their routine.

Well, it is very difficult for us to set our intentions straight every time we did somethings. And it is also difficult to keep it all the way through our life or refresh it every time when our intentions started to sway and diverge from its original path. We tend to forget it halfway or tends to do it due to ourselves.

"Shall I introduce to you a weapon which will protect you both from the evils of enemies and increase your sustenance? They said: Yes, O Messenger of Allah. He said: Call your Lord day and night, for “Dua” is the weapon of a believer.”

-Sahih Bukhari

Call on your Lord with humility and in private: for God loveth not those who trespass byond bounds. -Surah Al-Araaf 7:55

Ya Allah ...please help me..

show me the right way and guide me through my journey

I might be lost and my life is in awry

But that is not what I intended to be

p/s: I once heard a person say, “Ikhlas is when you didn't intensify what you're doing even though you are being praised, and didn't reduce it even when you are being criticized”.

Allahumma barik lahu